Tillamook Radio PREQUEL by Fourstories

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Industry Cheese
Media Radio
Market United States
Agency Fourstories
Director Tony Hertz
Creative Director Austin Howe
Account Supervisor John Drake
Released March 2004

Credits & Description

Advertising Agency: FOURSTORIES, USA, Portland
Creative Director: Austin Howe
Scriptwriter: Tony Hertz
Agency Producer: Cathy Curran
Account Supervisor: John Drake
Director: Tony Hertz
Sound Engineer: Andre Jacquemin

Script in English
ANNCR: Somewhere, in a medieval castle in Downtown Switzerland, a band of gallant knights assembles.
SIR LANCEBIT: It’s freezing in here.
SIR HANS: It’s not cold if you keep moving, Hyaaa! (THRUSTS WITH SWORD)
SIR SVEN: Easy with the sword Hans, we’re running out of squires.
HANS: I need to practice.
LANCEBIT: He’s got a point.
HANS: It’s months since we graduated from Knight school, and have we slain a single dragon?
SVEN: Not as such.
HANS: Rescued one damsel?
LANCEBIT: What we need is a quest (CHEWING ON SOMETHING) Mm this cheese is good.
SVEN: He’s right.
HANS: About the quest?
SVEN: No the cheese, what is it?
LANCEBIT: It’s called Tillamook, Sir Wastrel got it on a crusade.
HANS: Tastes better than our cheese.
SVEN: It’s an outrage!
HANS: Is it?
SVEN: This Tilla…
SVEN: Thank you…is an affront to our noble cheese tradition. Men, we have our quest!
HANS: To eat cheese!
SVEN: No idiot, to eliminate it. We’ll get rid of all Tilla…
SVEN: Thank you.
SVEN: To protect the reputation of Switzerland
LANCEBIT: Something to do I suppose
SVEN: At last, a noble cause! To your chambers men, we have work to do.
ANNCR: And so the Knights prepare to save the honor of Switzerland. And all because Tillamook is award-winning cheddar, farmer-owned since 1909.
SVEN: 1909, I’ve got armour older than that!
ANNCR: And clearly worth stealing.
Brief Explanation
Tillamook is a regional cheese brand. In the United States, consumers consider Swiss cheese the highest quality possible. The concept that Tillamook is so delicious that Switzerland would send "Knights" on a crusade to eliminate it in order to save the honour of their country is the basis for this surreal, humorous radio campaign. But there are no knights in Switzerland you cry! Told you it was surreal.